well the Big Fuck Off tour is over. my socks are stiff, my jeans are shiny at the knees and my crotch has rotted out permanently. my eyes are now decorated with dark circles from a chronic lack of nutrition and sleep, but on the plus side, it's first time ever we've all been pissed for a month and it was THIS much BIG fun. a big fat thanks to all of you who came along to the shows, and big FAT sorries to those who came along to find we had got lost or broken a bit off the van.

the tour saw us take to the road in a van you wouldn't even let a lame dog get put down in. but it had two sofas nailed to the floor, a disco ball and a "high-flyer" replica model of a yuppie with his briefcase suspended from the roof for good luck.Patrick Bateman would be proud. inbetween breaking down and blowing up, the van drove for some of the time, but mainly because martin was at the helm and even i would drive if he was towering over my nocturnally ravaged body. since the month of march began, i have thrown a punchbowl of fruit salad on darren, been banned from sheffield Novotel, hung around in the lobby of said hotel in my pants and demanded entry into the pool. as the great Dr. Hunter S Thompson once said, "when the going gets weird, the weird turn pro". there is definitely something very reminiscent of the great doctor when in a hotel. i suppose it's the lack of rules and the fact that there are people employed to cater for you - unless you want to go for a swim wearing 3D glasses.

above: some of the newly adopted extended family of SHITDISCO. we're like modern-day rave mormons

Hardcore Classics 2 and the best of Generation X were our sonic accompanyment for the majority of the trip. there was also the ipod when the tape player accepted it. when it did, we experienced some truly amazing, near out of body experiences while listening to Autobahn driving to somewhere on a road at 5am. there really is nothing like seeing several hundred people with glowsticks in their hair or being woken up to the sound of a klaxon in your left ear. ahh, to be on the road once more